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Stop Blaming Your Food and Find Freedom

lula_benchI worked with a woman for three years who would only allow herself pancakes once a year. A year. Not a week, not a month, not every six months, a year.

At the time, I was shocked, impressed and perplexed – shocked at the notion of only eating delicious, crispy, cakey, syrupy stacks once a year, and impressed yet perplexed at her militant restraint.

Why? How?

Our list of to-dos is endless – from groceries to the next juice cleanse to finally-kicking-sugar-forever-and-never-looking-at-alcohol-again. Do we really need countless rules and endless attempts to mold our bodies into pretty little boxes that don’t really exist anywhere? Is life worth living without pancakes and whatever other treats might call to you?

The answer is yes and no.
 
I am all for discipline – it keeps you going. Having a certain amount of discipline guides you to make aligned choices to fuel your body well, letting you perform well at work, authentically connect with others, shut down mental chatter, feel at peace and have fun.

Being spontaneous and a little “bad” is also totally necessary to stay balanced. When your baseline health is excellent and you’re deeply connected with your needs, your “bad” choices become key fuel, keeping things unexpected and exciting.
 
How many people do you see, robotically eating their way through their days, barely noticing what they’re eating and how much, feeling miserable and sick, or totally apathetic and monotone?

So, how can you avoid getting stuck in this grade C movie situation? And more importantly, how can you incorporate pancakes without feeling like a fat mess?
 
Question your choices. Why do you eat the way you do? Why are you vegan, vegetarian, paleo, or a cheeseburger addict?

A lot of things come up for clients and friends in this area – many eat in a certain way because they think it’s desirable or trendy, others have cultural or moral ties, some eat for pure enjoyment, and others for health, often to the point of neuroses.
 
Start to work down to the root of why you eat the way you do – talking to someone about this can be super helpful.

When you identify why, you will naturally make choices that serve you, because it will no longer be a battle, but rather, a loving relationship between your brain and body.

They’re not separate entities, and they’ll work together beautifully if you give them space to.

Pause and thoroughly take in your surroundings before eating.

Slowing down is 75% of the battle. When you eat quickly, hunched over your computer or the sink, your body and brain barely know food went in, and you’re more likely to overeat, since your stomach doesn’t have time to communicate to your brain that you’re full.

And even when you get stuffed, if it was rushed, the sensory pleasure was stunted and your’re left wanting more food, more stimulation and more pleasure – whether through food, alcohol, drugs or sex.

Crowd out. This is my favorite concept that I learned at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, my nutrition school. It’s so important to focus on what you can have, rather than what you can’t have.

If you decide to go gluten free, instead of sobbing over the croissants you’ll have to give up, start having fun with new gluten-free treats – the options are endless.

Recently, I began to reduce coffee and almost decided to completely give it up, but then I realized that it wasn’t a coffee problem, but a mineral deficiency.
 
So, how could I balance this mineral deficiency without totally giving up something that brought me pleasure?
 
Yes, coffee leaches minerals from the body, but if I moderate coffee and add a lot of seaweed and other mineral-rich foods to my diet, I notice a huge shift in my energy and health. By dramatically improving my baseline, I’m able to enjoy coffee in moderation. When I keep it sparse, I crave and actually enjoy it even more when I do have it, rather than going through the motions daily and barely tasting it.

Prioritize. Don’t try to do everything at once. If you suspect a food intolerance, do not eliminate all the prospective offenders at once – it will put your mind and body into a total spiral.

Try removing one at a time, and see how your body reacts. If you know you need to clean up your diet, don’t cut sugar and coffee and dairy all at once – it’s too restrictive, and you’ll end up binging and/or miserable. Talk to someone to help you figure out which item is key to remove first.

Stop the blame game. It’s likely that no one thing in your diet is “ruining you,” unless consumed in very large amounts. It’s easy to say, “When I give up gluten/dairy/sugar” everything in my life will be perfect. It’s not the case.

Instead of blaming a certain food item, gently challenge yourself to look at the full picture – how are you eating most of the time, how are your relationships, job, spiritual practice, exercise? Where could you use support? When you heal holistically, food is no longer always at center stage, and a deep feeling of freedom and lightness fills you up completely.

After all, pancakes are too delicious and photogenic to blame.

Now I would love to hear from you! What’s one small step you could take this week to shift the focus off food, lighten up, and get to the root of what’s going on for you? Leave a comment below!

Lula’s Original Pancakes
 
Ingredients

¼ cup coconut flour
¼ cup sweet sorghum flour
¼ cup tapioca starch
¼ cup potato starch
½ t baking soda
½ t baking powder
1 t salt
2 eggs
1 cup water
2 T coconut oil
1 T raw honey

Method

Whisk or sift all dry ingredients together: all four flours, baking soda and powder and salt.

Beat eggs vigorously in separate bowl, add to dry mixture. Add water, 1 T coconut oil and honey to dry mixture as well. Whisk until smooth.

Bring 1 T coconut oil to medium heat in skillet. Use ¼ measuring up to make small to medium, about ¼ inch thick pancakes. Cook for five minutes on first side, or until centers bubble and pop. Flip and cook for three minutes, or until cooked through.

Photo: Prospect Photography

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