As important as emotional processing is in connection to food, I do not want you to fall under the belief that you must be perfectly processed and aware at all times in order to avoid emotional eating, overeating, or eating out of alignment.

It’s safe to feel emotions that do not fall under the category of happy, chill, or neutral.

There will be times you’re pissed, you don’t have the space to fully process your emotions, and there is food present.

That doesn’t mean you have to use food to cover your emotions.

You can just be with them, without trying to change or fix them.

The misconception many of us pick up is that it’s wrong or bad to feel “negative” emotions, and we should try to sweep them away or numb them immediately.

But we’re not single-key pianos.

We’re meant to play all 88 keys, and feel every single emotion on the human spectrum.

You can only feel joy as deeply as you can feel sadness.

Only allowing certain emotions to fully exist in your body is like hammering away on the same key, expecting to create a symphony.

Opening up to my full emotional spectrum – accepting every emotion as beautiful and safe – was my key to healing from emotional eating.

Right now I am feeling anger toward someone close to me who made me feel very unsafe a few months ago. It’s an unprecedented situation I’m navigating for the first time.

I cry at night sometimes. I feel angry sometimes. I use lots of emotional processing tools, and still, I am not always sure what to do with my feelings.

But I do not eat to cope with these feelings… and I am someone who 100% would’ve used food in the past.

Sometimes I can sense that my emotions just need to be allowed to exist, to be safe to exist, without trying to fix or change them.

Why don’t I just use food to cope once in a while? It’s not the worst vice…

Because it doesn’t work – it doesn’t actually shift the feelings in any way – and because it doesn’t feel good in my body.

Emotional eating compounds emotions, intensifying fear, sadness, and anger, rather than pacifying them.

You can have dozens of tools and use them daily, but that does not mean you’ll always be able to neutralize your feelings the moment they arise.

It’s safe to just be with yourself exactly as you are, and you do not have to use food to try to “fix” your emotions or superficially lift your mood for a moment.

Say it with me…

Even though I may be feeling X, I am safe in my body.

Even if I feel the desire to use food to numb, I am safe in my body.

It’s ok to be where I am now. Nothing bad is going to happen if I just feel.

Everything beautiful and bright comes from fully allowing our darkest emotions to exist, without judgment.

Lifting judgment and embracing every emotional state shines the brightest light into our darkness… and neither exists without the other.

Allowing myself to really go into my emotions was fundamental to healing from emotional eating.

If you’re struggling today, I hope this message helps you.

With so much love,
Lula