10 years ago I was studying abroad in Florence, Italy, and loving life… only thing that wasn’t going so well: I was bulimic.
From the outside I looked young, happy, and thin. All that was true, but I was struggling SO much mentally, and physically destroying my body by binging and purging all the time.
This is how I looked to the outside world…
And although I was very happy about almost everything in my life, when it came to food and my body, this is how I felt inside…
I had a roommate at the time, who was also my best friend. We would sometimes share groceries to cut down on food waste. That’s where the issues came in.
I would always eat ALL OUR GROCERIES during binges.
There was one especially epic binge where I ate an entire jar of Nutella in one night. When my roomie casually asked me about it, I froze up.
She wasn’t being confrontational or shaming me, she was just genuinely wondering where the f*ck the Nutella went.
How I responded is the worst part: I played dumb. Literally. I pretended a god damn phantom entered our apartment and ate the Nutella. When really it was me.
I was so ashamed of myself that I couldn’t even fess up to my best friend. She had no idea I was bulimic, as far as I know. No clue how I covered that one up.
This is what happens when you deeply struggle with food and body image: You will lie to your best friend to cover your tracks and avoid addressing your issues head-on.
Have you ever had a moment of extreme food shame?
Leave a comment below and share with me.
Today I live in Caribbean Costa Rica, eat completely intuitively, never count calories or weigh myself, and have a better relationship with my body than I ever have.
I’ve spent thousands of dollars on coaches, healers, books, and programs to get here, and now I’m honored to share this work with my health coaching clients.
They’re seeing amazing results, just like I did from working with a coach who has the same training I went on to get, and have been practicing for over 7 years.
All I want you to know today is that I used to be CRAZY around food and my body – obsessed, addicted, and never satisfied – and now I feel confident, light, free, and focused.
It’s possible for you, too. I am not special.
What’s your biggest current food or body image struggle?
Comment below and I’ll coach you on the spot.
Much love and have a beautiful weekend,
Lula