lb_cafeI used to worry I was wasting my time by engaging in “pointless” conversations and activities.

I would skip after-work drinks to read a self-help book, write, workout, or clean.

Always working on something.

When I did find myself in everyday conversations at the coffee shop or on my bustling block in downtown Manhattan, I was warm, friendly, and happy to see people.

BUT I was also always rushing and telling people I was late or crazy busy…even if that wasn’t exactly the truth.

Now, I don’t really believe in mistakes, just learning experiences.

But I’m the first to tell you that I was totally wrong in this approach.

The problem? I wasn’t being present.

And when you’re not present, you miss the whole point.

So, am I a mean and thoughtless person?

No.

I felt guilty for “wasting time” when I could have been working in some capacity.

Guess what else I thought was a waste of time? Weekday meals.

When I sat down to eat, I was always thinking 1 of 3 things:

– Oh this is so healthy, I should eat more of it and really fast so I’m not hungry for junk later.
– OMG this is so unhealthy, I’m gonna get fat.
– Maybe if I eat really quick I won’t have to feel my feelings.
– I was craving it so much, I just can’t control myself.
– Will this make me gain or lose weight? Cue anxiety and indecision. Better eat faster so I don’t have to agonize over it…until I’m done.

See the problem here? When you’re not present, every area of your life suffers.

And no matter what diet you’re on, you’re always going to “fall off the wagon” at some point and gain weight.

Try being present with your food for two weeks as the only rule, and see what happens.

When you’re present you can tune into your body, choose the foods you need, and stop eating when you’re full.

When you’re always speeding to the next “better, more productive, more impactful” thing, you miss life.

When I stopped feeling guilty about “wasting time” and started fully engaging – and even lingering – everything changed:

  • I developed stronger friendships than I’d had in years.
  • My business doubled in income and list size.
  • The man of my dreams became my boyfriend in real life.

…and, I felt better in my body than ever.

The lesson?

“Pointless” human connection, slow meals, and unscheduled time are crucial for personal evolution, weight loss, and fantastic health.

What’s at the crux of it all?

Being present.

When you’re present, you connect fully with the person in front of you. You’re not looking over their shoulder to see if there’s someone “better” to talk to.

Now, this doesn’t mean you spend all day lounging in the coffee shop and chatting, but it does mean you bring full attention to the person in front of you.

How you do one thing impacts how you do everything else, so if you skim over your interactions you probably skim over your food too.

Meaning, you don’t really listen to your body. You grab what’s easy and wolf it down.

Chewing? Probably not happening. Sitting and breathing with no distractions so your digestive system can do its job? Takes way too long if you’re on the fast track to…nowhere.

When you’re present, you’re much more likely to eat what your body needs. And you might even naturally follow a process that looks a little like this each time you eat…

  1. Ask your body what it needs, then go get it.
  2. Look at your food, appreciate its beauty, and smell it. This gets your digestive system revved up and ready to go.
  3. Breathe deeply as you settle into your meal, and between bites.
  4. Chew slowly to kickstart your digestion and help your food exit smoothly, leaving you with high energy and a flat stomach.
  5. Stop when you’re full.

These five steps completely change how your body uses and eliminates food.

Even if you don’t change a thing about what you eat, following this system will lead to great digestion, natural weight loss, a flat belly, high energy, and sharp mental focus.

When you’re present, it’s easy to listen to your body.

And listen, lots of people talk about presence.

You might even get really annoyed when someone tells you to be present. But the truth is that it changes everything.

I first heard about presence from Eckhart Tolle.

But the truth is that no matter how much we read about something, putting it into practice is a different story.

So get honest right now: How much of the time are you totally present, and how much of the time are you on autopilot? Or thinking of the next best thing?

How would being present in every moment change your body and life?

Share as much or as little as you’d like in the comments below.

I’m here to support you and teach you everything I know about living an incredible life in a body you love, without dieting or giving up your favorite foods.

I can’t wait to hear from you!

Photo: Prospect Photography