Once in a while when I sit down for my daily meditation, I feel this twinge of anxiety. Suddenly I’m racing the clock and 20 minutes seems so intimidating. I have to gently remind myself that it’s not a contest, and my shoulders instantly relax and that nervous energy in my chest melts downward.
Yep, even experienced meditators get antsy sometimes.
When I remind myself that I’m not meditating for any reason except my own well-being, my angst drops.
We’re competitive by nature, and that can be a good thing. I’m all about working hard and taking deep pride in what I do, but when the competitive spirit dominates, sometimes we bring it into realms where it has no purpose, and we literally start working against ourselves.
Clouded by and drunk on the mere idea of winning, we force, push, and pull our way through work projects, exercise regimens, eating plans and even meditation.
Whoa. It’s not all a contest…
Engaging that anxious, competitive nature all the time spikes cortisol, causing us to attack the dessert spread at Thanksgiving and get super irritated when we don’t get exactly what we want at work. You ignore your natural instincts to eat well and act calmly because your body is shrouded with stress hormones. These hormones take control and put us on-edge in sometimes-stressful situations. I say sometimes because you have the choice. The choice to breathe, drop the competition, and be kind to yourself.
What if you felt calm and serene in the same situations, simply by affirming that it’s not a contest, against yourself or anyone else? Try it.
When we release this manic energy, drop down into our cores and let our foreheads relax, we’re able to actually make clear choices and do productive, fulfilling work without feeling weighted by anxiety and stress.
We end up choosing the right foods and excelling at work because we know it’s all for us. And by us I mean ourselves, and the collective whole. But it’s not for anyone’s approval – not for our boyfriend, girlfriend, or the guy on that TV show that said the perfect woman is 5’9″ and weighs 110 pounds, and has a six figure salary at 25.
When we bring calm energy into the world, we give others permission to relax and do their good work, not fight fight fight and still feel dissatisfied all the time. When we step back and breathe we allow ourselves and others to enjoy simple pleasures and appreciate everything they have, while taking action to make even more amazing things happen.
True leaders and lovers lead with calm, clear heads, not numbing, competitive tactics that leave everyone in a 10-mile radius on-edge. Plus, they just get more done that way and feel much better about themselves – at the dinner table, at work, in relationships, during exercise, and on the meditation cushion.
This Thanksgiving, choose love and serenity for yourself and share it with everyone you come into contact with.
From that place, you’ll find more happiness and fulfillment than ever.
Now I want to hear from you. Do competition, anxiety, or similar feelings come up too often for you? Are they helpful? When do you feel most serene, productive, and aligned with your core self? What’s one small area you could bring more calmness to this week?
Share below.
Photos: Jake Freeman