No matter how great our lives are, there are days we feel straight up lost and just want to curl up in the bath like the girl in this awesome photo by Magdalena Wosinska.
I recently had a day like this, where I questioned everything I was doing and wondered if my life was falling apart.
It doesn’t matter how great we feel in our bodies, how much money is coming in, how much sex we’re having, or how full and satisfying our social lives are. Sometimes we just have days where we feel straight up CRAZY. And that’s ok. There’s a simple truth I remind myself of to start feeling better quick. Keep reading to learn it.
I know firsthand that even some of the most “successful” people in the world – millionaires who have complete freedom in their lives and are in amazing relationships – have these moments.
The root of these crazy days – or weeks, months, even years – is the skewed perception that there’s one best way of doing things and we’re doing it wrong.
For example, you get the idea that paleo is the answer, but since you keep finding yourself elbow deep in a jar of peanut butter (and the super white flour crackers) on Wednesday after starting paleo on Monday, you feel like a failure, and like you’ll never feel comfortable in your body.
No two women I’ve coached have followed the same exact plan, and all of them have lost weight or healed a chronic condition like terrible digestion, cystic acne, or hormonal imbalance.
And it’s the same for every other area of your life.
It’s not just…
- High-powered 9-5 office job
- Become an entrepreneur and #workfromanywhere
- Or be a full-time mom
…there’s hundreds of wild combinations that don’t fit any one cookie cutter mold.
The people who live in acceptance of that truth for as much of their lives as possible are the happiest. We get tripped up when we have those days where we feel like we’re screwing it up and everyone else is doing it right.
When we accept that our path is different than anyone else who has ever lived, and trust our intuition and heart – rather than our heads – that’s when we feel at peace and can grow from a place of truth rather than fear, attachment, and judgment.
When we’re stuck feeling like we need to follow a specific path – whether it’s veganism or blogging as a career – we operate out of fear because we’re trying to be something we’re not. And not because we’re stupid or insecure, because we think it’s the only way to survive and be happy.
It might sound selfish to believe your path is 100% unique, but it’s actually humble since it leads you to be much more open and accepting of the fact that everyone else is also on a completely unique path.
Ultimately this leads to less judgment and more love and acceptance of others, starting with yourself. If you’re judging yourself, that energy translates and you end up judging others. When you accept yourself, you’ll naturally accept others.
So how can you make sure you’re living YOUR life and not trying to fit yourself into a structure or system?
Ask yourself this…
How and when do I feel BEST? Not just fine, ok, or simply safe and secure. BEST. ULTIMATE. HIGHEST SELF.
For me right now, I feel best when I’m in Kauai, Hawaii. And no, it’s not just about laying on the beach and drinking Mai Tais (although that part is awesome). I also noticed I work best there. My writing flows, any tension in my body dissipates, and I feel more connected to my clients.
Am I moving to Kauai tomorrow? No, but I am infusing the energy of Kauai – slow paced yet alive, awake, present, and nurturing – into my life by…
- Creating more space in my schedule (working less!)
- Taking more baths
- Giving myself quiet time, sometimes meditating and other times just relaxing quietly and observing my thoughts
- Connecting with the energy of Kauai through photos and people (my coach lives there, and I follow Kauai-related Instagram accounts)
- Being in nature and near water as often as possible
- Spending tech-free time
Looking back at the past few years, when did you feel BEST?
How were you eating? Was it during a vacation, under specific at-home circumstances – for example, when you had more help with cleaning or childcare?
I said it once and I’ll say it again: The reason we feel crazy sometimes is because we get caught up in the false idea that there’s one best way of doing things and we’re doing it wrong.
The answer is to trust what makes you feel best and do it, in all areas of your life. When you tap into this, you’ll be surprised at how relaxed and happy you feel.
What steps will you take to be in that space of feeling your BEST and trusting your unique path? It could be something radical like a cross-country move, or more subtle, like creating more space in your schedule.
Leave a comment below and tell me your next immediate action step, and if you’d like, your vision for the next year.
Photo: Magdalena Wosinska