I used to feel a lot of resistance and shame around asking for help.
Especially when it had to do with my body and health.
I felt like I should always have the answers.
In fact, my self-sufficiency has been so strong at times that I could’ve been biking through a flaming tunnel, and probably would’ve declined a water hose.
Over the past 5 years I’ve gotten a lot better at asking for help, and knowing I am not meant to do everything alone.
Asking for support is what helped me heal from disordered eating and deep self-judgment, and master intuitive eating.
And I’m so grateful to share that work today, through my coaching.
I am not meant to have all the answers, and neither are you.
I am completely lovable and worthy when I don’t have the answers, and so are you.
I am completely valuable when I know nothing, and so are you.
Because we are human be-ings, not human do-ings.
And when I know nothing, I can learn everything. I can see more clearly, without the goggles of “I know this already.”
Some of you might know I’ve been doing especially well the past two months…
– Expected and unexpected business growth.
– New health coaching clients I love.
– Deeply aligned new writing projects.
– Feeling very connected spiritually, and incredibly calm.
– Having really fun, supportive (and sexy!) virtual connections.
Yet I want you to know I still really feel it some days. The emotional climate. The energy. The simple reality of what’s going on in the world.
Some days I just want to cuddle up under a big fluffy comforter and not talk to anybody. Some days my body feels heavy, and some days I only want to talk to animals – no humans.
Regardless of everything going so well in my personal life, I am still having these days. And that’s beautiful. That’s perfect.
We are here on earth to experience the full human spectrum.
The innate bliss of every single emotion, from pain to pleasure — blissful because we are alive and present to experience them.
The current climate has given me a great opportunity to ask for more support, and lean on my tools and resources more than ever.
It’s still not always easy for me to reach out and get the support and connection I need, but I feel so much better when I do.
I’ve found so much joy, comfort, and pure FUN in my support system: Talking to my family and friends, and dropping deeper into my practices.
I’ve been infusing my brain and body with positive voices to stay anchored in trust and joy, regardless of everything going on in the world.
I’m accepting the reality of things and then reprogramming excess discomfort by listening to grounded, uplifting voices every day – whether through video or audio.
Lately it’s been Oren Harris, Amanda Frances, Genevieve Rackham, and Lacy Phillips.
I feel SO much better when I listen to these leaders.
I feel better when I talk to my family and friends.
I feel better when I take days to do nothing, and when I have very active days.
I trust my intuition completely.
I trust myself to feel tired and do nothing as much as I trust my electric energy and productivity.
I trust when I need to do something solo, and when I need to connect with people.
I need all these things.
And I’ve learned that’s great. That’s healthy reliance.
Feeling great in yourself AND receiving the support of others.
Taking care of yourself and being self-sufficient in a lot of ways.
Knowing it’s always ok to ask for help and fully receive it.
Unhealthy reliance develops when your baseline mood, relationship with yourself, and behavior is dictated by external factors…
… your achievements, work, money, relationships, approval from others, compliments, house, clothes, and anything else that could potentially be withheld or taken away.
Healthy reliance is being good on your own, and also knowing it’s great and normal to need other people and tools to lift you up sometimes.
Thank you, self, for learning this and being reminded of this.
Do you struggle with asking for help and leaning on other people?
How have you been feeling?
What’s your inner and outer support system look like today?
What helps you stay grounded without ignoring what’s going on in the world?
Share your thoughts with me in the comments below – I’d love to hear from you.
Hugs,
Lula