Food is the innocent bystander.

The humble servant.

No level of happiness, success, or money will cancel out painful life experiences, or prevent them from happening in the future.

Whether you’re depressed or in bliss, painful things can happen.

Whether you’re in your dream role or unemployed, painful things can happen.

Whether you’re with your forever partner or single and lonely, painful things can happen.

Whether you have $0 to your name or $300,000 in the bank, painful things can happen.

These painful things are not always a result of your “vibe,” a product of “negative manifestation,” or due to mercury retrograde…

… and I believe all those things can be factors, at times, but I also believe we’re more powerful than them, and that we get to choose ourselves.

Whatever’s happening or not happening, there’s always the option to numb out through food – or alcohol, caffeine, or something else.

There’s always the option to turn away from ourselves and toward food. 

To give food a job it fundamentally cannot fill – to fix our pain.

There’s also the option to stay with yourself, to cry, to scream, to rest, to move, to meditate, and when you’re ready, to ask for the support you need.

We get to receive love from ourselves and others through all the pain, and in every emotional state.

You do not have to show up with a smile when you feel like sobbing.

You do not have to pretend like you know when you do not have the answer.

The positivity parade is exhausting…

… and it makes a lot of people turn to food for a break.

The pressure to be “high vibe” can make you feel guilty for having painful experiences.

Like something is wrong with you.

Nothing is wrong with you, and when you realize that, the tension diffuses and you’re better equipped to navigate painful experiences.

Your baseline is stronger… and your vibe is higher.

I used to use food to manage my emotions, until I realized my “secret weapon” — binging and then getting rid of my food — was seriously harming my body.

Plus, it became clear that using food to manage my emotions was not effective at all.

In fact, it compounded my negative emotions and left me feeling worse than before.

That’s the moment I fully committed to intuitive eating, in 2012:

I was turning the corner onto 9th Street in New York City, where I lived for seven years in my late teens to mid twenties.

Suddenly it hit me that my disordered relationship with food was seriously harming me.

On an instinctual level, I knew that I couldn’t continue this way and keep my health.

It felt dire.

I had tried so many different approaches to eating, and I was still struggling to feel good in my body and at peace with food.

At that moment it became clear that there was only one option for me:

I had to commit to eating what my body was asking for, then observing how she responded.

I promised myself I would never hurt myself again – even if I felt uncomfortably full.

I haven’t used my “secret weapon” since 2012, and I haven’t eaten beyond comfort in any significant way since then.

That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy a rich meal or a slice of cake, but I do not use food to manage my feelings, and I do not make myself sick with food.

If you’ve been struggling with emotional eating, if you feel trapped in a restrictive cycle with food, or if you just feel completely confused by food, support is available.

I’ve been coaching women on intuitive eating, emotional eating, and deep holistic nourishment since 2012, and now, a master class is available.

>> Click here to get more details on the Mechanics of Intuitive Eating master class, and get started on your journey today.

Whether you’re feeling called to this work or not, I’m sending you so much love on your path.

Trust that the next step is now coming into focus for you.

With so much love,
Lula

Photo: Jessica Torres