And if you feel you have extra weight, how it’s serving you…

… and how to let it go, if that’s what you want.

I want to preface this by saying no body shape or size is better or healthier, by default.

Big bodies can be healthy, small bodies can be unhealthy, and everything in between.

Weight is not a direct indicator of health, happiness, or worth.

But you’re allowed to want what you want. To feel how you want to feel. To look how you want to look. To move through the world with energy, joy, and a clear head.

You’re allowed to want to lose weight, as long as it’s coming from YOU, and primarily rooted in how you want to FEEL and BE.

This isn’t about the messages your mom or boyfriend subtly — or not so subtly — are sending you about your shape or size.

This is about you.

How you feel when you wake up in the morning.

When you get dressed.

When you go to work.

And when you settle in for a glass of wine with someone you love — or a new friend you think is really, really hot and smart.

If you feel like you have extra weight you want to let go of, this practice is crucial…

 

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Intuitive Self-Approval Ritual

Read through the full process before beginning.

STEP 1

Create sacred space for yourself. Clean your space, burn some sage, and light candles. Lay out a yoga mat and meditation cushion, or if you have an altar, sit there. Have a journal and pen nearby, and make sure you won’t be interrupted for at least 30 minutes.

STEP 2

Sit in a comfortable cross legged position, with your hands resting face up on your legs. Set a timer for 10-20 minutes.

Breathe in and mentally say “I am,” then exhale and mentally say “enough.”

I AM ENOUGH. YOU ARE ENOUGH. WE ARE ENOUGH.

Repeat as you inhale and exhale. When your mind wanders, come back to mentally repeating this phrase on the inhale and exhale.

STEP 3

As you enter a meditative state, begin to make natural sounds on the exhale. Start with a sigh and then make any sound that feels natural.

You do not have to make a sound on every out breath. Feel into your body, notice any tight spots, and connect with your intuition to feel into what sounds need to be made to help you process stuck emotion.

I was raised with the principles of Re-evaluation Counseling, and when I got upset or sad my parents encouraged me to make noises, any noises.

Sound processing is real. The reason we scream, sigh, or laugh when certain events, emotions, and sensations come up is because sound helps us process them rather than holding on to them.

Held fear and anxiety manifest as illness and dis-ease in the body. We need to express ourselves through sound.

But as teenagers and adults, we’re taught to shut up and listen, or “be chill” – especially women.

Chill is boring. Feel your feelings.

Making intuitive sounds on the exhale will help you let go of any heaviness, and send your body the message that she is safe and sound in her current shape and size. Only from there can any healthy, aligned, changes happen.

When there is nothing to change, your body is free to calibrate to the shape, size, and health that is natural and feels best.

STEP 4

During the second half of your meditation, or perhaps the final quarter, place one hand near your heart and one hand near your uterus, or lower belly.

Thank your body for protecting you. Really thank her.

Tell her she’s safe. She’s loved. You approve of her completely. And she is free to naturally fall into the shape and size she desires, which is the shape and size that will feel best for you.

STEP 5

Journal it out. When the timer goes off, give yourself 5-10 minutes to reflect on what came up for you, what you’re releasing, and what you’re affirming.

What are you letting go of? What are you stepping into?

This is an intuitive process. Throughout the meditation, come back to “I am” on the inhale, and “enough” on the exhale, while you’re moving through the other practices. Trust your process and what your body is asking for. Listen to her deeply.

 

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Here’s the thing…

Your current body type is protecting you. Any extra weight is protecting you.

Keeping you energetically connected to what’s safe and familiar.

Your body has natural defenses against anything unfamiliar.

 

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She’s guarding you from new attention and experiences your body perceives as a risk, because they’re new…

– New comments from colleagues, and how they might make you feel separate.
– A new level of sensuality and sexuality, which we’re taught is dangerous.
– Unwanted attention from men or women, which can make us want to hide.

 

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But new experiences are a huge part of a satisfying life.

And we don’t want to stay stuck and small just because our brightness could present new challenges – and trigger some people we love.

Once you assure your body she is great TODAY, AS IS, NO ALTERATIONS – and that she’s safe – she’ll be free to do what she wants.

To settle into her natural shape and size.

The form that FEELS good to you. Where you feel alive and connected.

Until then she will keep rebelling in an attempt to protect you.

She will enter fight or flight – the sympathetic nervous system state – and hold on to every bit of body weight, to keep your organs safe.

To make sure you have enough energy. Because with all the judgment, loathing, and controlling she’s received, she doesn’t know when she’s for sure getting fed again.

Thank your body for protecting you.

Forgive her for holding onto heaviness you might feel is holding you back.

Assure her she will always be fed and cared for.

And release your tight grip on her, your attachment to how she looks. Your need to control her, to keep her small and tight. Then she can look and feel the way she wants. And you can relax, and just be.

And watch. You’ll feel like yourself again. Like the ultimate version of you. You’ll get your natural metabolism and energy back, effortlessly.

Thanking your body and fully approving of her now is a non-negotiable step to making any physical shifts.

Of course, this practice is just one piece of the puzzle – but it’s a big one, and you cannot skip it, I promise you.

After going through this process myself and coaching clients for over 7 years, I can assure you nothing else will work if you do not approve of and love your body today.

When self-love and approval are not 100% integrated – meaning, they aren’t an innate part of who you are and how you do life, rather than simply intellectualizing them – nothing else will work.

No diet, no strategy, no workout regimen.

I hope this practice is helpful for you. Leave me a comment below with your experience.

So much love,
Lula

Photo: Paula Simons