I have this excitement in my body, for the desires that are on their way to me.

Sometimes so much so that I forget I don’t already have them, but it’s not sad when I remember…

… because I’m in bliss in the present moment.

In presence there is only joy, because we are alive.

Plus, why would I feel my desires coming if they weren’t on their way?

Why would they even be in my conscience?

I used to be timid to pursue my desires. To name them.

Tentative. Dipping a toe in and then scurrying back to safety.

Back behind the desk. Back behind the bar.

Back behind myself. Into my shadow.

Because what if I don’t get my desires, and then I feel sad and ashamed?

Hmph.

Today, I know that it’s safe to want them, to name them, AND to be overflowing with joy right now.

To be committed to joy, whether I ever get my desires or not.

Because that’s the whole point.

Basking in the full human experience TODAY. In this moment. Right now.

Not someday, not IF, not WHEN.

Now.

This is what it means to match the frequency of what you want.

To feel the feelings of already having it without making your present moment anything less than what it is, if you are alive and awake – ecstasy.

Even in pain, there is ecstasy.

We are here to feel the full spectrum of emotion, and we cannot selectively numb feelings.

We can only feel joy as deeply as we can feel sadness.

It is necessary and safe to feel it all.

Your desires are divine. Highly specific.

Not random. Not selfish. Not bad or wrong.

Innate in you. Completely unique. DIVINE.

It’s safe to pursue them without labeling the present moment deficient.

It’s all perfect now, and it’s all coming in perfect timing.

When we deny or tamp down our desires, we often look to food to “satisfy” our “desires” – but it doesn’t touch the surface of what we really want.

What we want to feel.

What we want to experience in our bodies and in our lives.

In fact, the food takes us further away from what we truly desire, when it’s used as a cork: Filling us and filling us until we can’t feel the pain of not having our desires yet.

On the other hand…

When we can feel the excitement of our desires coming…

When we can stand firmly in our desires while releasing the fear of not getting them…

When we can be with the full spectrum of wanting, waiting, not having, receiving, holding… all of it, in ecstasy, it’s effortless to be in aligned relationship with food.

Because we’re no longer giving food a job it can’t fill – to satisfy all our desires.

To be our soul source of pleasure.

What is one of your desires today?

Speak it below, if you feel called.

Naming and owning our desires is the first step to reaching a deep sense of satisfaction that food itself can never touch.

Sending you so much love,
Lula

Photo: Rodolfo De Jesus David